We Overvalue our Needs and Undervalue our Wants

My last podcast episode: Become a Ghostwriter: Rent Your Pen to Tell Uneasy Stories That Make a Difference is inspired by the book The Art and Business of Ghostwriting, written by Nicolas Cole.

In the book, Cole discussed moving the clients from “What they want” to “What you know they need". This idea resonates with the design thinking mindset which emphasizes understanding people’s wants and needs.

Design thinkers use empathy to uncover hidden desires and unspoken needs. They dig deep into the root of problems, reframe those problems, and often uncover opportunities for innovative solutions. This approach transforms surface-level issues into deeper, more meaningful insights.

But today I want to see wants and needs from a different angle.

We tend to overvalue needs—the things essential for survival or practical use—and undervalue wants, which we often see as indulgent or secondary. As a parent, I instinctively teach my children to focus on their needs, while relegating their wants to the category of “rewards,” “luxuries,” or “extras.”

Like an alchemist, if we manage to mix different ideas, we may find insightful perspectives. Here are the 4 perspectives about needs and wants that I would like to share with you today:

1. Wants + Good Purpose = Catalyst

Wants are natural drivers of human progress—they inspire us to chase for better versions.

• Better clothing becomes fashion.

• Better food becomes culinary art.

• Better shelter becomes a real estate

Our wants drive human growth and development. Undervalued wants will suppress our creativity and innovation. However, unbridled wants without direction can lead to negative outcomes.

• “I want more resources” may lead to war.

• “I want someone to fill in the gap of my lost partner” may lead to a toxic relationship.

• “I want people’s recognition” may lead to endless chasing of perfection.

The key to leveraging wants positively is to add a good purpose to them. With purpose, our wants become catalysts for positive change.

Purpose: Creating a win-win

• “I want more resources” may lead to the co-creation of new resources with your neighbor.

Purpose: Empowering people

• "I want to fill the role of my lost partner” may lead to the birth of a single-parent supporting community.

Purpose: Commit to life-long learning.

• “I want people’s recognition” may lead to a learning mindset from people’s counter-arguments.

2. Needs – Vision = Stagnation

We define needs as essential elements for survival, growth and fulfilment. Unfulfilled needs may lead to instability or extinction. But when needs exist without a clear vision, it creates a gap between what you require and how to achieve it.

Imagine needs as the fuel for a car and vision as the map leading to a destination. You may have sufficient fuel to drive. But without vision, you will end up going nowhere. Vision gives you a destination and purpose, turning the fuel of your needs into meaningful progress.

If you want to make a change in your work and life, without vision, without achievable goals and actionable steps, you will wander aimlessly, wasting energy and opportunities.

3. Wants x Curiosity = Ideation

Our wants are great motivation to drive us to aspire and acquire something we don’t possess. Many of us consider our wants will lead us to chase money, reputation, luxury and other materialistic goals. But when curiosity amplifies our wants, they evolve into a source of creative energy, unlocking new ideas, solutions, and perspectives. It resonates with the concept of Ideation in Design Thinking, which means:

• We see things in a wider spectrum and deeper insight because we can’t tolerate superficial and tedious perspectives.

• We generate more innovative possibilities because we are no longer satisfied with one single answer.

• We drive actions because we are urged to test, learn, and adapt, turning aspirations into real-world outcomes.

4. Needs / Silo = Narrow Focus

When needs are divided into silos, they result in a narrow focus, which limits our growth and connection. With this mindset, our minds will only focus on what we possess. We shut the door to sharing and collaborating.

In our personal growth, our narrow focus on what we process will kill the opportunity to grow. This is because we have to give up to move up.

What do we have to give up? Our ideas, our methods, and our ego. Let me explain:

• Give up your idea: Admitting your idea does not work is hard. Treating every idea as an experiment. You will always win because you will find out either what works or what doesn’t.

• Give up your method: Many people said, “Marry your problem and date your method.” We should stick to our passion to solve problems, but not stick with our methods.

• Give up your ego: Like a conductor who humbly believes that all the musicians will play better than himself/herself, stay humble and curious to improve. The more you give up, the more you will gain.

So, what is your formula to Add, Subtract, Multiply, or Divide the ideas in your mind?